So far, I’ve met two women from the internet, and both times they weren’t as they described themselves. One said she was “average build” and was clearly overweight. What’s the deal?
This is the second most common complaint I hear from men. (The first being lack of responses to their ads.) Having talked to a lot of men and women, I think I finally found out the problem.
Men and women often have different definitions of the word average. Men think of a woman with an average build as being somewhere between skinny and fat. Women think that since the average adult woman is slightly overweight, then average is the correct term. Women aren’t trying to be deceitful, and men aren’t trying to be shallow… they just have differing views.
What can you do about it? Ask for a recent photo before you meet, and don’t build up unreal expectations of your potential dates. I’m sure there’s plenty of things about you that aren’t perfect, too. Everyone has flaws, and everyone has things they’d rather not be the first thing a new person notices.
Physical appearance can be so entirely subjective that it’s almost always better to let the picture do the talking, whether you’re a man or a woman, young or old, skinny or plump. Don’t lie or stretch the truth to fit what society or the media declares attractive… Find someone you thinks your the best thing since slice bread JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.
Choosing the Best Dating Site
There’s hundreds of dating sites out there, so how do you choose which one is right for you? There are sites like Dating Review, which lets readers rank their favorite dating sites, but those can only go so far. Besides, what’s good for one person might not be so good for you, and one person’s bad date might taint their idea of an otherwise great service.
Well, what’s important to you? Are you looking for someone to date, or something more erotic like adultfrienedfinder? Are you only interested in dating someone from a specific geographic region, or someone of a certain ethnicity? Straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual? And where do you live? All those factors change what the perfect dating service is to you.
Some sites are strictly for dating. Some cater to intimate encounters and living out sexual fantasies. Some are for certain regions, by city, state, country, etc., and some for Blacks, Hispanics, Asians, yadda yadda yadda. There’s different sites for every orientation, as well, and some sites have different sections for all of them. Some dating services have a larger demographic in some areas than others. If you live in a very small town, you’re not as likely to find a lot of local matches as someone who lives in New York City.
But it all boils down to finding one special person. A needle in a haystack. Sometimes finding the needle is easier in a smaller haystack.
My advice? Try as many sites as you’d like. Most have free trials, or at least allow free searches before you sign up. If a site you’re interested in doesn’t offer a free trial, write them and ask them. Many are happy to oblige.